As I sit a robin sings his morning song,
tea in hand, dog in my lap
I wait expectantly,
I listen . . .
all I hear are crows, and wrens.
Where are you?
It has been so long since
I felt your presence.
I long to feel your touch on my cheek,
to hear your whispers in my ear.
I want to be enfolded in your Holy embrace
I search my heart for you.
I seek you in the eyes of those I meet.
I cannot find you, and
without you I am lost.
There is so much to tell you, but . . .
you are not there to hear.
Patience I tell myself, you will come.
So like a Desert Mother I sit day after day and wait,
listening, longing,
silent I sit.
Amelia with her brother Liam and Suzie, the Chihuahua
Amelia is a 5 year old, little girl who is a mixture of tomboy, imp, princess and budding scientist but most of all a Grammy’s delight. Walking home from school with Amelia is always an adventure. Today we hadn’t gotten even 100 feet from her school when she bent over and said, “Look Grammy, I found a purple maple seed.” Amelia hands me the seed and says “now you carry this for me I want to show dad.” Off she runs to her next exciting stop, which is about 50 feet ahead. “Look what I can do Grammy,” she said as she runs up a yard to the brick wall and with one heart stopping leap lands safely on the ground in front of me. “My, my you are so good at jumping,” I said as I pushed my heart back into my chest.
Running ahead of me again she suddenly stops and gets down on her knees, as I walk up to her she is talking to a small ant hill. “Look how busy they are, Grammy, where are they going so fast?” “Well,” I tell her, “this is a new ant hill so they are just building it up right now and gathering in some of the leaves for food. Don’t disturb the nest or they will bite.” “Really,” she says as she prepares to test my theory. “Yes really, and those bites hurt so let’s leave them to their work, OK.” “Ok,” and she is off again.
“Help me look for snails, Grammy.” Amelia has a love affair going with snails of every shape and size. She picks them up and carries them carefully along with her, until, that is, she forgets she has them in the heat of a new discovery and then the snails are old news. Sometimes she carries them all the way home and we release them into the backyard and into the wild.
Every moment with Amelia is a discovery in a half, every rock a treasure trove, every leaf a rare jewel to be enjoyed. Worms and snails are potential friends or pets to be trained. We sing songs to stop traffic on our progression across a busy street and she dances down the street to a tune in her head.
Oh the life of a 5 year old, a world of discovery ahead and an imagination that has no boundaries. Where does all of the enthusiasm go to as we grow older? Is life so trying and stressful that we forget just what it means to be in the moment? As I watch my little adventurer skip down the sidewalk I am trying to remember what it was like to be that carefree, and find delight in a snail slowly making its way up a wall.
Maybe that is what grandchildren are for, to awaken in each of us that little boy or girl lost in the mists of time. To remind us of the important things like snails, red leaves, purple maple seeds and sunshine and shadow. Amelia has reopened a door I thought was shut and locked. A part of me remembers and dances with my little genius, princess, geologist, archaeologist, biologist, and junk collector as we walk home from school.
Yesterday was Memorial Day, the day we remember the service of those who have fought our wars and protect our borders. We sometimes forget there are more than men in the line of fire. Women are now serving in positions where they too are potentially at risk. And, there have always been animals, pigeons, and dogs who have laid down their lives for a cause they cannot understand and they do it for the love of the soldier partner. Today I am asking you to remember in prayer those faithful winged and 4-footed creatures who have willingly give up their lives.
As You gaze at the picture take a deep breath and let it out slowly, take a second breath and let it out slowly, let your shoulders relax and your gaze soften.
Look deeply at the picture and let the colors and image enter your imagination. What feelings does this bring to the surface? What memories or stories? Imagine you are walking are a soldier whose lives and works with this faithful dog, what does that look like and feel like to you.
Respond to the image with a prayer for all God’s children who serve in dangerous places on this earth. Offer a prayer of intercession and gratitude for the service men, service women, and service animals who protect us while we sleep.
Continue to gaze at the picture, breathe deeply and rest quietly. Let God pray in you in silence beyond words.
Last week John and I took a train ride to Vancouver, BC and while we hoped for some sun it was even cloudier there that at home. As we walked through Stanley Park I was afraid all my pictures would be gray and drab and then I saw this one. Yes, if the day had been bright and sunny I suppose this picture would have been brighter. But, the trees in their autumn finery reflecting in the pool made a light all their own. I just had to “open” my eyes to see it.
Today for Prayerful Tuesday I am inviting you to open your eyes and open your hearts and minds as we practice Visio Divina using the above picture. There is no set time frame for the guided prayer, but I do suggest at least 15 minutes and up to thirty minutes.
As your prayer begins, take a few moments to open your heart and mind to God.
When you are ready, slowly look and notice the image, taking your time to let feelings and thoughts come to you as you take in forms, colors, lines, textures, and shapes.
What does it look like, or remind you of?
What do you find yourself drawn to?
What do you like and not like?
What are your initial thoughts?
What feelings are evoked?
At this point in your prayer simply notice your responses without judgment or evaluation. If you don’t like the image, or the feelings it evokes, notice that this is your initial response and continue to stay open to the image and the prayer.
If you have an immediate idea as to what the image means, again, simply acknowledge that this is your initial response and stay open to “the more” as the prayer unfolds.
As you expand your prayer, return to the image with an open heart and mind. What new thoughts, meanings, and/or feelings arise for you; what initial impressions have expanded deepened.
Explore more fully the meanings that have risen up within you, and the feelings associated with the image and its colors and forms.
Be aware of any assumptions or expectations you bring to the image. No how you responded to the image — delight, disgust, indifference, confusion — prayerfully ponder the reason for your various responses and what they might mean for you.
As you go deeper into your prayer, open yourself to what the image might reveal to you.
What does it and the Holy Spirit want to say, evoke, make known, or express to you as you attend to it in quiet meditation?
Become aware of your feelings, thoughts, desires, and meanings brought up by the image: how they are directly connected to your life.
Does the image hold an important meaning or value for you: does it remind you of an important event or season, or suggest a new or different way of being?
What desires and longings are evoked in your prayer?
How do you find yourself wanting to respond to what you are experiencing?
Offer a prayer to G-d in ways that the image evokes: gratitude, supplication, wonder, lament, confession, dance, song, praise, etc.
As bring your prayer to close, bring to mind or jot down in a journal (whatever way is most helpful for you) the insights you want to remember, any actions you are invited to take, wisdom you hope to embody, or any feelings or thoughts you wish to express and remember.
Close your prayer by resting for a moment in God’s grace and love. May you see with newly open eyes, heart and mind many new images of G-d in the coming week.
In the past month I have begun the InterPlay Life Practice Course. For those of you who have never heard of InterPlay I can only described it as a time to play with my body/spirit/heart/mind all at the same time and it is a blast! Of course the founders of InterPlay have a much longer definition, that in brief, is a system and practice that allows you to lean slowly at your own pace to love being an embodied being by bringing into one whole Mind/Body/Spirit/Heart. But for me the term “it’s a blast” works best. (If any of you are interested in the longer definition please visit http://www.interplay.org and there you will find all kinds of information and also where you might find an InterPlay play group of your very own.) Within my small community of new friends and playmates I am discovering what it means to free myself from the confines of “ought and should” for the openness of the possible within me and I find it extremely freeing and uplifting. In the freedom to dance and song, alone and in community I am discovering a new me. Well not really a new me rather let me say the real me, the one who laughs, and sings, and dances, and prays, and cry’s and morns, and laments, and worries, and creates, and brings to fruition all of the pieces that make up the being I am, in this body, in this place in time, the real Ruth is beginning to step forward. My steps are tentative and small right now, but I am hopeful that in the very near future they will become leaps and bounds of joy.
I realize all of this probably makes little sense to all of you, heck it still isn’t making much sense to me. But I hope that in the coming months I will be able to clarify the joy I am feeling and be able to share just a little with you. I realize I can’t just give you my experience, but maybe I will be able to open the door for one or two of you, inviting you into a space where you too may explore your true being. It might not be with InterPlay, it might be in some other way that allows you to open your being to new light, and I hope you will share that with us here at the Begin Again, Cloaked Monk blog, or here on my blog, A Quiet Walk.
So, today as a way to begin anew, I invite you to join me in a body prayer for morning:
1. I invite you to stand, if you are able to, if you are near a window or have access to the outside that would be wonderful, but not necessary.
2. Stand for a moment and breathe deeply, taking air in and letting it out slowly.
3. Now take another breath, this time noticing how cool the air is as it enters your lungs and how warm it is when you exhale.
4. Take a third breath and follow it into your lungs, noticing how your lungs expand to hold the fresh air. Imagine that you are seeing the exchange of oxygen that fuels your body for the waste product of carbon dioxide. Let yourself find joy in the workings of your body.
5. Now raise both hands to your chest placing them palm to palm in a prayer position. As you do so offer a prayer of thanksgiving for your health and well being.
6. Now raise your arms up over your head, stretching out to reach for the sky and offer a prayer of supplication for someone who lies on your heart.
7. Lower your arms and return your hands to a praying position. Bend head, and/or body, slightly and offer the following, “may the peace of the Holy Spirit be with me and those I love this day, Namaste.”
8. Stand still for just a moment to allow yourself to return to your day.
And so my prayer for all of you this day is; “May the peace of the Holy Spirit be with each and every one of you this day, Namaste.”
1 Corinthians 12:12-13: 12For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. 13For in the one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and we were all made to drink of one Spirit.
This last week I have been giving a great deal of thought to the importance of all of the parts of the body. And, it has given me completely new insights on Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 12:12-31. You see I had a blocked gland removed from the underside of my tongue on Thursday and I have learned just how dependent I am on every part of my body. I mean you try drinking, talking, even breathing without using your tongue for awhile and you will understand what I mean! However, given what has been happening in our nation’s capital it seems ironic that it is my tongue that is giving me a problem.
But enough of the gory details! Paul of course is writing to his wayward community in Corinth, which has a few problems getting along with each other. Does that sound familiar? Paul is telling his young Corinthian faith community they need each other because all of them are important and all are equal in the eyes of Christ. Not unlike the conflict we’ve been seeing in our nation’s capital this past week and I am afraid it will take another Apostle Paul for a resolution to this crisis to be resolved.
What might Paul tell our community today? Well one line he might repeat is “the body does not consist of one member but of many” and that each of the members is needed to perform some task that sustains the whole body. No part of the body could say “I do not belong to the body,” the tongue cannot say “I am in pain, so let the eye take my place,” trust me that isn’t going to happen. Just as the fireman cannot say to the man whose house is on fire I am to important to get my hands dirty, therefore I will not help you. That man’s house will burn down you can be pretty certain of that.
Today in Washington DC and in the rest of this country we have people who are saying just that. “I am to important to feed the hungry, or clothe the poor, or help the sick and elderly, or do anything that would make me see you as important in G-d’s eyes. I have my house with all of my barns stuffed with grain and produce that I have worked for and if you can’t take care of yourself, well that’s not my problem.” What these so called “important” people forget is that someone else prepared the ground, sowed the grain, harvested it and stacked it in his barn, they didn’t do it themselves. Just as in Jesus’ story of the rich man with all those full barns, G-d will come and say “Fool! This night your soul is required of you; and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?” (Luke 12:20) and it will be too late.
Paul told his community, “the members of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and those members of the body that we think less honorable we clothe with greater honor, and our less respectable members are treated with greater respect: whereas our more respectable members do not need this.” (1 Corinthians 12:22-23) Paul’s words ring with the same authority today as they did in the First Century, for those we hold in low esteem in our community are the ones who are harvesting our food, making our clothes and building our houses. Just because they don’t wear a suit and tie, or nice dresses doesn’t make them less valuable to the whole body of our communities. I would love to see the Speaker of the House in the fields of California harvesting lettuce; it would do him and the rest of our politicians good to do some really hard labor. There perspective on what is important would change dramatically, that is if they survive the 14-18 hour, 7 day a week job. Let them live for a year as an elderly person on Medicare and Social Security trying to make ends, trying to pay for food, rent and medical care on the little they have. Or, they could choose to take care of a family whose child has cancer or some other debilitating disorder. Let’s see if they could do any better with the medical bills and all the rest of the needs of a family on $50,000 a year.
Each of the “unimportant people” are part of the body of this country, and of the body of G-d. In fact according to G-d they are more important than those who sit in the “great halls of government.” For G-d tells us all “do not abuse any widow or orphan,” (Exodus 22:22) or “oppress a resident alien.” (Exodus 23:9) But those verses are conveniently forgotten.
We are all part of the body of G-d, of creation and the creator. We are all part of our country and world, whether you are a business person, a working person, a widow, a widower, orphan, or an immigrant to this country or any country. Each and every one of us is important to the wellbeing of us all and the Creator’s purpose for us as a whole people. No one is more important than the other; we all have our tasks to do in this life that will lead us into the next life. This week I learned a lesson that every part of the body is important no matter how insignificant I might think it is.
The tongue can be an instrument for good will, or a sword that hurts and divides us all. My tongue hasn’t always been a good instrument. Just like ever one else there here have been times when I have said hurtful things to others and I can’t take those words back, as much as I might wish too. Yet I have also spoken words of kindness and caring that I hope in the eyes and ears of G-d outweigh the bad.
This week has made me aware of the incredible gift of all parts of the body, the seemingly insignificant, and the ones that I erroneously hold in high honor. We all have the power to be good gifts of the body, the body of our country and world, and the body of the Spirit. No matter how insignificant each of us seems to be each is important to the functioning of this grand creation gifted to us by the creator. Paul ends his short discourse on gifts of the body with the words: “But strive for the greater gifts. And I will show you a still more excellent way.” Each of us has the potential within to do even greater things than we do. It takes each of us to encourage those gifts in each other such that we all prosper, just as the Creator wants.
I am on a journey, a long journey
Begun before I entered my mother’s womb
To be carried on long after
I am finished with this clay pot
I stand on the moving head
of the pin of the now
Behind me is my past
In front of me my future
With every moment my now moves into my future of shifting possibilities
Leaving behind what was for. . . what is
Shadows of my life follow
Hazy outlines of what could be lie before me
I am like a piece in a strange board game
I cannot move backwards
Into the safe yesterday
I can only move forward into uncertainty
G-D the uncertainty frightens me
I want to go back, to the places that I know
I cannot see into the gray tomorrow
I want to know you will be there
My friend, do not be afraid, I am with you
now as I was in your past
I am in the now and travel with you,
I am there already
Ancient of Days I make my choice
I will take your hand
I will go into the shifting sands of uncertainty
My spirit will journey on, my friend calls, I come
I have set my bow in the clouds and it will serve as a sign
of the covenant between Me and the Earth Genesis 9:13 (Torah)
This last past week has been especially disturbing with gun violence in so many places that I have lost track of where they all are. I can’t even be sure that all have been reported by the ever present Sad News Division of our national media. There have been simply too many acts of violence to report.
All I can do is offer prayers of comfort and safety for every person on the planet because I can’t name all the communities, families and individuals affected by gun violence this week. I don’t think that has ever happened before. One of my greatest fears is that massive gun violence, or violence in any form will become the “new normal” for our lives and we will begin to ignore these incidents because they become common.
Every day I pray to the Divine Spirit of us all that we will stop killing each other long enough to recognize we are brothers and sisters. I pray that, knowing that while my prayers may be heard by the Spirit there is little hope of them being answered unless we all of us, hear that prayer and yell “ENOUGH!” The killing will not stop until we, the people, say we have had our fill of guns in the hands of the mentally ill, of the glorifying war and banditry to entice our children into these acts as play, and of having our children shot, bombed, starved, and abused all for the glory of some pathetic so called religious or political despot. So today on this our Prayerful Tuesday I would like to offer the following prayer of peace, petition and intercession. It is called the Caim, the encircling prayer, a form of prayer used by early Celtic Christians.
Circle Prayer of Peace, Petition and Intercession
Putting Ourselves in the Holy Spirit’s presence
Circle me, O Holy Spirit;
encircle me with your presence.
Keep joy within, keep bitterness out;
Keep generosity within, keep greed out;
Keep wholeness within, keep sickness out;
Keep wisdom within, keep folly out;
Keep strength within, keep weariness out;
Keep truth within, keep falsehood out;
Keep compassion within, keep hard-heartedness out;
Keep hope within, keep despair out;
Keep peace within, keep turmoil out;
Keep love within, keep self-seeking out;
Keep light within, keep darkness out.
In the name of the Sacred Three, the Parent, Child and Holy Spirit, Amen
In the name of the Sacred Three, the Parent, Child and Holy Spirit, Amen
Prayer for Peacemakers
Circle, O Holy Spirit, those who work for peace,
encircle them with your presence.
Keep wisdom within, keep folly out;
Keep strength within, keep weariness out;
Keep generosity within, keep greed out;
Keep truth within, keep falsehood out;
Keep compassion within, keep hard-heartedness out;
Keep hope within, keep despair out;
Keep love within, keep self-seeking out;
Keep light within, keep darkness out.
In the name of the Sacred Three, the Parent, Child and Holy Spirit, Amen
Circle those who are victims of violence and injustice
Circle, O Holy Spirit, (name people and places),
encircle them with your presence.
Keep truth within, keep falsehood out;
Keep compassion within, keep hard-heartedness out;
Keep strength within, keep weariness out;
Keep truth within, keep falsehood out;
Keep compassion within, keep hard-heartedness out;
Keep courage within, keep fear out;
Keep peace within, keep turmoil out;
Keep love within, keep hatred out;
Keep light within, keep darkness out.
In the name of the Sacred Three, the Parent, Child and Holy Spirit, Amen
Circle those who commit acts of violence and injustice
Circle, O Holy Spirit, (offer name[s]),
encircle them with your presence.
Help them to see the truth and to turn away from falsehood;
Help them to learn compassion and leave hard-heartedness behind;
Help them find the courage to turn away from evil;
May they feel your love in a world filled with hate;
Help them to see your light in the darkness.
In the name of the Sacred Three, the Parent, Child, and Holy Spirit, Amen.
Prayer of Blessing
The peace of the earth be upon you
The peace of the sky be upon you
The peace of the sea be upon you
The peace of the holy Spirit be upon you
upon you and all of G-ds creation
The love of the earth be yours
The love of the sky be yours
The love of the sea be yours
The love of G-d, Christ, and Holy Spirit be yours
and all of children of the Holy One.
An old Hebrew root for wilderness means “to speak,” {dabar – meaning “to speak” is a primitive root of midbar – meaning wilderness, a place where you can hear G-d speak}. Those who traveled into the wilderness were outsiders, minorities, women and Judean peasants and they were the ones that heard G-d speak. All too often we believe we have to be on the “inside” to hear G-d’s voice, we must “do it the right way” in order for G-d to notice us and accept us. Yet that isn’t the way I’ve observed G-d work. It is the outsider, the minority, the woman, the one who seems to be doing it all wrong that is called by G‑d.
How often do feel as if you are on the outside? Might G-d be calling to you, inviting you into the wilderness, to hear the voice of the Creator? Today I invite to take this moment and breathe deeply. Breathe out your burdens, worries, your cares and the responsibilities that weigh on you. Sit in stillness and open up to G-d’s voice. G-d will take your concerns and tend to them while you rest in G-d’s loving kindness and grade. Breathe in G-d’s presence and love for you. Remain still for 5 or 10 minutes in your inner silence and breathe the breath of G-d.
My prayer for you this day is that the stillness of this moment will remain within your heart all day letting you see G-d’s grace and blessings in all of the days tasks.
A Quiet Walk 