I Turned Off the News

I turned off the news,
disgusted, angry, sad,
not sure what to feel.
I have tears to fit them all.
With raised arms I shout,
     I scream,
          I cry,
              
Guns do not help.
violence does not help.
silence in the face of violence does not help.
        I am at a loss to find what helps.

Ears are blocked with hate.
Hearts are blocked with hate.
Minds are blocked with hate.
    How do we move past the hate.

I hear the names;
     George Floyd,
          Breanna Taylor,
               Travon Martin,
too many to name.
Too many tears.

I see the violence,
police with guns, tear gas, stun grenades,
protestors with guns, bottles, rocks.
I understand the
     frustration,
          fear, and
               anger.
          Answers are not found in violence.
The call for peace,
     compassion,
          understanding of the other
               lost in the chaos.

Leaders call for dialogue and forgiveness
yet that seems so trite,
so little when so much is needed,
     but maybe,
          it’s right.
We need a different way,
we need to let go of old ways.
This world
can’t
wait.

Ruth Jewell, ©July 26, 2020

A Psalm of Lament

Where are you, O God.
You left me here . . . so alone.

You walked with me,
       held me in your arms.
You whispered.
     do not be afraid, I Am here

But not today, O Lord.
Today I am alone, afraid.

Come, O Sacred Sprit.
I long for Your comforting touch,
    Your sweet kiss
    light upon my cheek.

O Gracious Presence,
I hold Your words in my heart, my being.
I dance with harp and trumpet,
I shout, O my Soul
     with joy and song.
I sing Your praises in
     the Cathedrals of field and mountains.
Your grace fills me to overflowing,
     my heart swells with gratitude.

Come, O Holy One
I need, I long, for You.
I long for Your blessings.
Come dance with me.
Come sing with me.
Come hold me,
O Spirit of life.

Ruth Jewell, ©July 23, 2020

Image: Sunset, Edmonds WA, July 16, 2013, Photo Ruth Jewell

God’s Gift

God of the forest and field

God of the mouse hiding in tall grass.
God of the hawk, hunter of mice,
     food for her chick.
God of life nourishing life.

God of the coyote hunter of rabbits,
     food for her kits.
God of the rabbit, feeding on dandelions.
God of life nourishing life.

God of the creek to the ocean

God of salmon swimming downstream and up.
God of the Bear, fisher of salmon,
     food for the winter long.
God of life nourishing life.

God of the Osprey hunter of trout,
     food for her chicks.
God of the trout from cold mountains lakes,
God of life nourishing life.

God’s gift,
     life nourishing life.

Ruth Jewell, ©July 22, 2020

Olympic Peninsula, Hurricane Ridge, September 2003, by Ruth Jewell, The ‘fog’ is smoke from wildfires.

love has a fur coat

Blessed one in coat of fur
    warm body, sweet breath
    tiny paw tucked in my hand
    dark eyes gaze into mine
    ears pricked,
          listening to my voice
    small pink tongue
          licks my nose

You trot along beside me
   head held high
   tail wagging a mile a minute
You tell the world
   this is my Mom
          don’t you bother her
I may be small but mighty

Blessed small furry friend
   jumping and spinning in greeting
you have the courage of a wolf
the mind of a cunning fox
the heart of angel
you are my comfort
   snuggled close,
   warm joy in a fur coat

Blessings small furry person
who holds my heart
in his paws.

Ruth Jewell, ©July 17, 2020

Image: Louis Guido Maximillian Jewell

Remember

Remember dawns cold light,
     calves calling, cows munching.
Remember white foals,
     soft hay laced breath.
Remember buckets of water,
     heavy, cold, fresh from the well.
Remember fresh eggs
     still warm from the nest.
Remember eggs, pancakes, bacon and hot coco,
     kept me going ‘till lunch.
Remember hot, steaming, metal tubs of water,
     babies bathing first,
                             poor dad always went last.
Remember beginnings,
Remember endings,
Remember endings that led into beginnings,
Remember,
Remember,
Remember.

Ruth Jewell, ©July 17, 2020

Old Pine Memories

She was a grand old pine
She, I always thought of her as She,
would whisper and sing
songs of water,
earth,
sun,
wind,
and welcome
how I loved her voice

She was our playmate as
we sat under the canopy,
lazing on hot summer days
swinging on the old board swing
     twisting, then releasing
     gazing up into the branches
     dizzy, whorls of green light

It was game, who would get sick first.

Games were played beneath her branches
houses made of her sticks and needles
     She was always home base

Nighttime she rapped on my window
     rain sang through her arms of green and brown
snow held her branches down
     creating a cave beneath to shelter in

Pine tree-friend
you sang me to sleep
danced with me in the wind
shielded me from hot summer sun
protected me from rain and snow

Oh, how I miss you my friend

Ruth Jewell, ©July 15, 2020

Image: Yosemite National Park, October 2017, Photo Ruth Jewell

A Collect

They/Them of beginning
     and endings
They/Them breath
calls you to be
partners, followers
co-creators, caretakers

We bring into They/Them silence
whispered gifts of
morning songs and
evening prayer

For we are grateful
Holy gratitude

Ruth Jewell, ©July 14, 2020

Image: Sunrise, Edmonds, WA, June 12, 2014, photo, Ruth Jewell

ode to a loaf of bread

Flour, salt, water, leaven
4 simple ingredients
the DNA of a simple loaf of bread

Good flour, good salt,
sea salt of course,
mixed together, soft and white

Water, fresh from the spring,
water contained, life giving water
stirred with leaven
                                    growing, bubbling

Sticky dough poured out
folded, pushed down
with floured hands

        turn,     fold,      push,
                turn,      fold,     push,
                        turn,     fold,     push

until

a smooth ball is born
soft, floury, smooth

ball        cradled in a warm bowl

        growing
                               aging                    
                                                                    until

                pushed up                  and out

punch down,
                           pour
                                          out
gather into my hands
          turn,     fold,     push,    stretch

As I shape the loaf into a floury round,
it springs up in my hands
The leaven is breathing inside

A cross, cut into the top
breaks the surface making
4 deep grooves where butter flows like a river

Bread baked,
                  scent of flour, salt, and leaven
                                                             drift from the oven

Food of life
                                                        staff of life
who will eat my loaf
what table will it grace

Great Cathedral or humble street corner
Lord, or commoner
all eat a simple loaf

Communion, Lord’s Supper, Eucharist
wherever 2 or 3 are gathered
a simple loaf graces the table

A simple loaf
The staff of Life
Bread and Grace,
A simple loaf
Offered
Received
Eaten 

Ruth Jewell, ©July 13, 2020

Dark Questions

This is the beginning of a discussion with myself on the re-visioning of my theology of God.

Dark energy moving
through cell, and bone, and flesh
Life flowing
Life Creating
pushing, pulling primal elements
together, apart

Home is a network
labyrinth, webwork of life
held together by ancient
arms that welcome,
that push back into
new life

Longing for home where
life begins anew
energy, dark ad moving
flowing, entering, leaving
cell, bone, and flesh
beginnings . . .  endings
life creating

Ruth Jewell, ©July 12, 2020

You and I Together

We began this journey with
paint brushes and camping gear

We laughed and sang and
danced down the aisle

We traveled the world
you and I

Eucalyptus trees, canals, sandy beaches, forests
memories, time, love, together

Now we, you and I, hold memories close
forgotten in time

I listen as the past closes a door
the future comes to soon

We are traveling a new road,
a road well traveled

Still an adventure
still a journey

So, I light a candle to bless the past
I ring the bell to bless what will come

You are my light
my blessing

We travel together,
always together, never alone
 
We who are one
are never alone

Ruth Jewell, ©July 12, 2020