I Am Tired of Crying

For the last two months I have been in tears or close to tears. Every time I hear of someone dying unnecessarily from the Covid virus because they are poor, an immigrant, or an indigenous person, I cry. Every time I hear someone has to go to work without the proper health care or safety precautions because they need to survive, I cry. Every time I hear of a black man, woman, or child being harassed by a police officer who should not be on the streets, I cry. Every time I hear of a black man, or woman being killed by police officers who have no place carrying a badge, I cry. Every time I hear a person of color cry out “I can’t breathe,” I cry. Every time I hear of a political leader speak callous, cruel words because they want to exert their power, I cry. Every time our state or federal legislators refuse to acknowledge the humanity of every person in this country, Black, brown, yellow, white, womxn, man, LGBQT, or differently abled because they are poor or just different, I cry. Every time I hear white men with guns verbally and physically abusing those who disagree with them, I cry. 

I am tired of crying.

All I want are the children of this country to grow up without tears, without pain, and without suffering. I want each child to know that those in authority care for them no matter their skin color, religious affiliation, or who they are. I want every child to know they are loved, cared for, because without the children we have no future, no life, no anything.

All I want are the people to recognize how racism, hate, white privilege and white supremacy are destroying our country. All I want is each person to be seen for who they are rather than what someone labels them. I want an end to the injustice meted out to people only because they are different from those who wrongly call themselves the elite. I want people to see each other as members of the same species, Homo sapiens sapiens, not different, all the same. I want the insanity of hate and greed of those in power to end. Is that too much to ask for?

I am tired of crying.

I am a white womxn, an old white womxn and am no longer able to go into the streets and carry banners, but I can scream, really loud.  I am screaming right now, through my tears. 

STOP HURTING EACH OTHER!
STOP KILLING EACH OTHER!
STOP TREATING EACH OTHER AS LESS THAN YOU!

START CARING FOR EACH OTHER!

START HOLDING EACH OTHER!

START FINDING HOW EACH OF YOU ARE ALIKE!

START LOVING EACH OTHERS’ DIFFERENCES!

BLACK LIVES MATTER!

WOMXNS’ LIVES MATTER!

HISPANIC LIVES MATTER!

ASIAN LIVES MATTER!

INDIGINEOUS LIVES MATTER!

LGBQT LIVES MATTER!

THE DIFFERENTLY ABLED LIVES MATTER!

YOU MATTER!

Ruth Jewell, ©June 1, 2020

2017, A NEW YEAR?

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A new year has begun and I am not sure what it will bring. Usually I have a sense of new beginnings, or I have excited expectations and hope as I pick up from where I left off and start over again. Not this year though. There has been too much acrimony, too much hate, too many lies, too much racism, and too little justice, mercy, kindness, and peace for me to look forward to the coming year. Sad really, because it seems 2017 is already defeated before it is a week old. I am afraid 2017 will just be a year of more hateful speech, more injustice, more discrimination, and more violence.

There is no one person to blame, we all are responsible for the atmosphere of distrust and hate we see every day, in the news, from our politicians, from our neighbors. Let me make this clear, you and I are to blame from the people who fear the changes created in the last 30 years. We forgot that people might not understand, might not be willing to accept those changes. We assumed they would go along “when the discovered how much better they had it.” But they didn’t. No, they felt left out of the process, unasked, and left behind, and they felt their concerns and issues weren’t being addressed.

Yes, they could have become involved and worked with those of us who believed we were working to better the lives of everyone, and the environment. But somehow, they didn’t feel as if they could. Maybe they didn’t believe as we did, maybe they needed to be given more information, maybe they just needed more time to assimilate all the information being thrown at them. Whatever the reason some people became alienated and open to manipulation by those whose agenda is to turn back the clock to a time when only the few profited from the bounty of this country.

Maybe the reason for the divide is that those of us who want to see us progress broke into interest groups who fought over what issue was most important when, in reality, all of it is. No one has ever bothered to look at the larger picture. To try developing a program that would have given equal emphasis to each issue. To bring together the disparate interest groups formulate a policy that would have benefited each area of interest. The modernization of each issue, environment, inclusivity, racism, woman’s rights, children’s right, poverty, immigration, all of them, each is dependent on the other.

What do we do now that we have a president whose only interest is his own personal gain, a congress dominated by old white men bent on preserving white privilege, and the hate and racism propagated during the last eight years by has let loose violence and terror in our communities. Well, to start we work together, all interest groups working together to keep what has been achieved from being lost. Our job now is to stand up when we see abuse or harassment and protect the victims, stopping hate speech when we hear it, and working to prevent injustice wherever we see it. None of this is easy. It isn’t easy to do and it isn’t easy to work up the courage to take a stand. But that is what we are called to do.

I am a person of faith, and 2016 sorely tested that faith. Yet I still believe in what I was taught that we are to act justly and to love kindness, mercy, and compassion. We as a people of many faiths and beliefs are called to care for the disinherited, the lost, the incarcerated, elderly, young, and the stranger. That doesn’t change even though it has become much more difficult at the moment. History moves in many ways and we repeat our mistakes over and over again. We have the possibility to achieve great heights or astounding lows. The choice is ours. Do we repeat history or do we show that we can change history.

Ruth Jewell, ©January 3, 2017